How to Get My Head Straight

So here it is, I'm in the middle of another work day with more than my fair share in front of me. How do I clearly construct a document describing what our first governance body will look like? How do I get our Omani shareholders to cooperate in the moments leading up to filing for our AIESEC company? How do I leverage the media to recognize the great things that AIESEC will do for Oman? How can I gain the trust of the government ministries so that they will bestow us with their blessing to move forward?

And what do I do in a room full of white and black?


The last couple days have been an up and down like I haven't experienced in a while. I had a meeting with two of our three shareholders, who we are now referring to as Guardians, during which I could literally see and feel everything coming together. I saw the potentials turning into reality and all the planning turning into action. And now comes the follow-up... Like twisting arms, pulling legs, slapping wrists and breaking knuckles (not really, but try to see my point). In the midst of it all, I see myself succumbing to the weight of the Omani work ethic - lulling me into a place where deadlines don't matter, time moves but I stand still. And all the things worth doing feel all too ominous. All of these feelings after I felt like I could change the world only two days ago.

And then their was the white and black. I don't think I will ever get used to this. I decided to go to a play at the university at the bequest of a student friend who was acting in the play. Called "Shakespearean Night," it was a comical look at how Shakespeare would have directed his own plays, albeit if he were Omani and acting in front of a crowd of Omani students and teachers with sprinkled expats. Costuming was good, acting was laudable... the setting before unimaginable to me. I should have expected it really, I know that school - it is not ultra conservative, but still segregated to a degree (by sex that is). And so, the late-entrance experience, what to me is already usually awkward, skyrocketed in awkwardness as I took a quick glance upon entry to see black in the two sides with a big, wide white stripe down the middle. For those unfamiliar with the colors of sex, male is white and black is female. Now, the awkwardness wouldn't have been that great had we only been our usual crowd of a few dudes. But, we were with women, an Omani and a Colombian. And instead of playing by the rules, we all sat down together in the big White Stripe. And I began to sweat...

But, what begins well ends well, so I am starting to think that all of the apparent build-up by the Omani codes of conduct surrounding male and female interaction are really just meant to keep everyone on edge, and those in the younger crowd just know what is expected of them but don't really have as much esteem for the rules as I initially expected. I've been having these thoughts for a while, but just now built up the courage to express them. Hopefully this goes well, too. And please know that I only have good intentions.


So... my head is crooked, cocked just a little to the side - searching for ways to get straight again. I've got this persistent nauseousness that flares up from time to time, but never really leaves me. I can't figure it out really, although I have a few theories. I am love deprived, and not just the romantic type. Any and all physical contact with people has been removed (save for a casual handshake here and there) and the biggest reason I have to believe that I am yet human is that I still feel the primal urges for eating, sleeping and, well, you know... I am only hoping that there is some brevity to my insanity. Amie, it's time for you to be here.